


Whole.

by argenterie



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Implied Sexual Content, Public Sex, Resolved Sexual Tension, Sex, Sexual Content, Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-08
Updated: 2014-06-08
Packaged: 2018-02-03 22:49:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1758919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/argenterie/pseuds/argenterie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ginny, struggling with the memory of Tom, finds comfort. And becomes Whole.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Whole.

Ginny curled on the rug, which she had pulled all the way up to the hearth.  She had first sat down here when the fire was still burning strong, sitting as close to the flames as she could bear.  She was just trying to thaw out – she felt deeply frozen, somewhere, on the inside.  She had felt the skin of her face grow tight from the heat of the white flames, knowing she would peel, knowing that she would lose that skin, but needing to lose it.  
  
Now, hours had passed unnoticed.  She watched the dying embers, absently wiping tears from her eyes without realizing it.  Her heart ached.  She felt the heat from the fading coals, and it felt like nothingness.  She had thought to forget her past and finally become a normal young woman, and all she found was another place she did not belong.  A throaty laugh fell from her mouth, red and harsh – a single, vaguely disguised sob.  Then she was quiet again, watching the blisters in the coals.  
  
Suddenly in the silence, an impulsive memory crashed into her, not concealing itself as it pressed into her mind: The skin of Tom’s back, tightening at the apex of his neck, thin and pale and lightly gleaming.  Ginny’s breath grew shallow.  In this moment, she saw her coppery hair clenched in his fingers, his eyes burning into hers.  His entire presence enveloping her, twining around her and breaking her.  He had always held her tightly, with a desperate tenderness that still somehow felt cruel.  
  
This invasive memory was a brilliant sun casting its gold-white dream of passion on mind – wet, luxurious, hot.  Ginny felt the thickly opaque beating of her heart become rapid at first, then empty and cold.  His fingers had been like eyes: they saw everything she tried to hide.  The dying firelight caught her eye, still overwhelmed with the memories.  She abruptly heard Tom’s voice in her head, telling her that her red-gold hair was like liquor, like cocaine, slipping down her back.  Telling her how beautiful she was.  And she remembered believing his every word.  
  
Ginny covered her face with her hand to stop the memories from flooding in.  She watched the fire, trying to forget everything and bring herself back to calm.  It was impossible – silent tears welled up and smeared on her cheeks.  
  
In the depth of the darkness behind her, she heard a quiet sound.  She quickly wiped her face with her robe sleeve and turned her face up.  It was Seamus.  He was standing at the foot of the stairs up to the dormitory, watching her, watching the dying embers pulse red and gray.  She blinked at him, not speaking.  His face was illuminated by the dim light, and his mouth curved sorrowfully.  As she watched him, he walked the distance to her and sat beside her on the small, thick rug.  He did not look at her directly, and she saw that his eyes were fixed on the dying fire.  
  
The silence drew on.  
  
Ginny did not know what to do.  Her thoughts were tangled, desperate – she wanted to reach out to him, speak to him, but she was so afraid.  So afraid.  She felt her muscles tense and her throat close in her confusion.  Why had he come downstairs?  Why was he so quiet?  
  
Finally, Seamus turned away from the fire and looked at her.  She gasped.  His eyes: so blue, sparks from the embers glistening in them.  His eyebrows crinkled slightly.  It was as if she could see all the way into his soul, into the profound grief that resided there.  She had never seen anything like it in anyone besides herself – even Harry never had this soul-baring look in his eyes.  Ginny swallowed, and felt the sting of tears gathering behind her eyes and in her throat.  She still did not speak.  
  
He reached up with one hand, and brushed her hair out of her face.  Then he spoke, quietly, gently, carefully.  “Ginny.  Please don’t cry anymore.”  He paused, and his eyes flickered back and forth between hers.  “You have been hurt… I can see it in your face…”  He put his hand on her arm, and leaned closer.  “Someone hurt you,” he said, and it was not a question.  
  
Ginny tried to keep her tears back.  Her heart swelled in her chest, a horrible and yet wonderful weight pushing within her.  Someone knew – Seamus knew.  He knew her suffering.  He had guessed what she had gone through, exploited by evil.  Perhaps he even understood what pain she had been taught to accept as love.  She was broken now, her tears running down her face.  Seamus wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly, and rocked her back and forth on the stone floor beside the hearth.  The night was late and no one else in Gryffindor was awake, and no one heard because there were no sounds.  She was silent in her pain and in her release.  
  
At last Ginny stopped her tears and pulled slightly away from him.  She blearily looked up, and to her amazement, she saw love in his eyes.  Coiling and subtle, his despairing adoration for her was lurking in his gaze.  The grief she had seen earlier must have been entirely based on concern for her.  Her sudden astonishment must have shown in her face, because he bit his lip and looked away before speaking again.  
  
“So now you know,” he said.  
  
She nodded.  
  
He looked into her eyes, and she felt a sort of stirring, somewhere deep inside her.  She did not know what her heart was telling her.  _This is Seamus_ , she thought.   _Seamus, not Tom – he doesn’t even look like him_.  Yet Seamus’s hands were still pressing against her sides, and he was rubbing her lightly with his fingertips.  She did not know what she wanted.  Her fear had evaporated, she wanted something, but what was it?  What was it that she wanted?  She wiped the last of the tears from her face and looked back at the hearth.  
  
She had not yet spoken, but she spoke now, very quietly, as she watched the glow of the embers.  “I want to love you, but I do not know how…”  
  
Seamus placed his hand on her cheek and pulled her face back around to look at him.  “Ginny, you have only known pain.  I can’t fix it…  But I can show you that it doesn’t have to be that way.  I could show you how it could be better…”  He paused and looked at her closely.  
  
She held her breath.  Then, Seamus leaned in and brushed his lips, very softly, against hers, and he kept his glorious eyes open as he did.  Ginny gasped against the tender pressure of his mouth, and her body seemed to awaken from a long, long sleep.  She pushed her fingers into his thick blond hair and pressed her lips into his, feeling his mouth open to hers.  His eyes closed, so she closed her own, and lost herself in the acceptance and passion that churned between them.  Her breath came fast.  The dim light shone on their embrace in the night, as they lay intertwined before the cooling hearth.  
  
Ginny pulled back somewhat and quickly reached for the clasp on his robes, her head spinning wildly.  “Can I, Seamus?” she asked, unhooking the button with two fingers.  He nodded and pushed the robe back off of his shoulders.  His eyes gleamed as he reached for her again, pulling her close.  She barely knew what she was doing, but his kisses on her throat and shoulders were making her so giddy she couldn’t breathe.  
  
His hands moved lower and lifted the edge of her untucked blouse, sliding beneath it to skim across her belly.  The touch of his fingertips on Ginny’s skin caused her to choke for an instant, goosebumps rising all over her body.  Seamus looked up at her, and while his eyes matched hers, he slid his hand upward and grasped her breast.  As he did it, his mouth dropped open a little, as if he couldn’t believe he actually had the courage to do such a thing.  The wonderful throbbing between Ginny’s legs intensified, and she pushed herself up against his hand, whispering, “Yes…”  
  
At this point, everything began to happen very quickly, it seemed to Ginny.  Feeling his hands on her, and the luscious pinch of his fingers on her nipples, it was all so amazingly strange.  His lips traced down her throat and came to the opening at the top of her blouse, and he flicked his tongue across her bare skin there.  She opened her mouth in ecstasy and pressed against him harder.  Her hands, which had been tangled in that beautiful blond hair of his, moved to his pants, sliding over the hard warmth there, and undoing the fastenings.  His breath on her skin was fast now as well.  Suddenly, her blouse was gone, and he was suckling, moving his fingers over the other nipple.  She lay back and arched upwards, a dizzy whirlpool overwhelming her senses.  She ran her fingers across his belly, finally moving down and grasping his cock firmly.  He pressed against her, and she could feel his gasp: a sharp exhalation against her breast.  She writhed under him, her body hot and wet.  She had never known anything like this.  She kept thinking,  _Seamus?  It’s really Seamus doing this to me?_   His shock of sandy hair fell over her chest, gliding over her breasts as he moved from one to the other: it was definitely Seamus.  The feelings were dominating her, and she twitched and shivered in her amazing pleasure.  She took his hand and moved it for him, placing it between her thighs.  At the touch of his gentle fingers, her eyes closed – she shook and arched upwards against him again and again.  She pulled him down to kiss him deeply, blindingly, and he slid two fingers deep inside her, moving them rhythmically while caressing her clitoris with his thumb.  She whimpered softly into his mouth.  
  
“Ginny…” She opened her eyes to look at him as he pulled away.  He looked as if he was nearly overwhelmed by the whole experience.  “What do you want?” he asked in a whisper.  
  
“I want you, Seamus,” she said quietly, somewhat out of breath.  “I just want you.”  
  
“Are you sure?” he asked.  
  
She nodded, gazing up at him with her eyes full of passion, her muscles clenching and releasing.  She needed him.  He would be exactly what she had been looking for.  Who cared if it was the Gryffindor common room?  It was the middle of the night, and it would be relatively safe.  She reached for her wand and whispered a silencing charm, then a charm to make them both  _dim_  in case anyone happened past, before setting it aside.  
  
Seamus carefully unbuttoned her skirt and opened it, then hooked his thumbs over her underwear and slid them down before removing his own pants.  They both kneeled naked before the hearth, heat now radiating from them both.  She lay back and he moved atop her, caressing her sides and hair with his hands.  She took his cock in her hand and rubbed it back and forth across her entrance, feeling shivers rush throughout her body, before he spread her legs further.  They met eyes, watching each other, as he slowly pushed himself into her.  She had her hands on his hips, pushing away with one hand and pulling him closer with the other.  She grimaced at the sharp pain, but she wanted him so badly.  She wanted this love, this true love, which was nothing like what she had undergone before.  She wanted a love that she could believe in.  She wanted him to be inside her.  
  
She looked up at him and set her jaw, and pulled him by the hips fully within her, biting her lip from the pain.  He watched her intently, his eyes wide with pleasure, and whispered, “Oh God Ginny…”  Then slowly, slowly, he began to move.  He pushed in and out of her, deliberately, as he brushed her mouth and neck with little nibbling kisses. Ginny’s pain quickly faded to the incredible rising of her body’s delight.  It centered  _there_ , and moved out in a spiral, pushing her farther and farther into oblivion.  He moved faster, and she moved against him, meeting him at each stroke.  She was silent, her ecstasy overwhelming her too much for her to create words, and the only sounds were those of their breathing and their bodies moving together. Suddenly, rapidly, Ginny felt a great opening in her body’s center, as if an angel were spreading its wings wide, so wide… She pressed her fingers into Seamus’s hair again, and pulled his face into her throat, gasping.  
  
“ _Seamus…_ ”  
  
 _\---oh god the god the explosion the shiver movement---_  
  
And she overflowed with bliss.  She lost herself in the desperate expansion of her entire being, feeling her body shake with release. Her eyes opened, watching Seamus watch her come, and saw that her orgasm would trigger his as well.  He gazed into her face and breathed one last time before he, too, was trembling in climax.  She felt the goosebumps break out all over his shoulders as he came deep inside her, shuddering with the beauty of it.  His muscles collapsed and he pulled her closer to him, and her orgasm was still happening, clenching around him as he spent himself inside her, until finally it was over.  
  
After a few moments, Ginny kissed his lips softly, in a way that cannot be described except as pure, so pure and honest.  She touched his throat with her fingers, she touched his back, and ran her palms over his skin.  It was brown and freckled, not pale, and it was still beautiful.  
  
He lay silently on top of her, letting their breathing come back to normal, and watching her eyes.  Her whole body was still quivering, the shivers still ran down her back and over her skin.  
  
And she spoke.  
  
“You have made me whole again.”  
  
And he responded.  
  
“I love you, too.”


End file.
